Cloying Vines

Cloying vines of guilt,
Trip you up,
Hold you down,
Keep you small,
Tempt you into responsibility,
Tempt you into carrying other peoples burdens,
Whilst they sleep light and flutter free,
Cloying vines of guilt,
Bred from a crime you did not commit,
The crime of the hungry wolves,
Who devoured your innocent soul,
So you could cover their tracks,
And dress them up worship them serve them,
Free them from their tears through your fear,
Of living in a godless loveless world,
Cloying vines of guilt,
A jungle of rampant undergrowth,
Yet one in which you have built a lonely home,
A sense of shrouded security,
A prison for your dreams and divinity,
Until the scales fall from your eyes,
And the catastrophic truth sets you free,
I did not crucify Gods son,
Neither did you,
The redeemer redeemed,
And the ascension prevailed.

(It is timely for me to post this poem following a conversation I had with a friend yesterday on this theme. We were discussing our needs and how we feel when we stand up for our needs. For both of us this feels difficult because we feel guilty about appearing 'needy' and we fear the reaction and judgement of those with whom we are in relationship. Somehow, somewhere we learnt that to express our inner needs and expect these to be met was not our right. No, this was the right of others and it was our duty, our loyal duty, to meet the needs of others. This is what we were taught as the natural order of things exept it is not natural at all. Yet if this is how we define love and care in a mutual relationship then this is what we will get. If this is all you have known then how can you imagine more without triggering the 'cloying vines of guilt'. This is a truly devious lie and one which it takes great courage to unravel and to face. For who's guilt is it that you are choosing to carry if it is not yours? Who originally 'outsourced' this guilt to you and tempted you into accepting it if not someone who you thought you could trust? Hence, as you follow this trail you arrive at the 'catastrophic truth' - there have been 'hungry wolves' in your life and you did not recognise them and you still do not recognise them for to do so leaves you without your dream. Hence you wander along, niaive and hoping it won't happen again; attracting those very wolves and their ravenous desires. The last four lines of the poem contain the keys to unlock this prison. I have expressed them in religious terms yet this is only one way of phrasing things. In essence, these words are the instant release from guilt.)